3. Cultural Conflict of Mother-Daughter Relationship源'自:优尔-'论/文'网"www.youerw.com
In this novel, there are many conflicts between Chinese and American cultures in people’s ordinary life. Though this continuous conflict, we can notice the giant distinction between the Chinese culture and the American culture. And this kind of conflicts is a most important part.
3.1 Chinese Obedience to Parents and American Independence
We all know there are some different thoughts and feelings between mothers and daughters. The Chinese mothers in The Joy Luck Club expect their daughters to do things in the way as they do. They have been brought up to be obedient to their parents. It is impracticable for some parents to exact obedience from their children, but they regard the children as their underlings and expect total obedience from them. Owing to the different education, the mothers hold the belief that all the traditional values shall exist in the daughter’s mind. Thus, one thing that should be done is just sensitize it, and make this mind more shinning.
Born and grown in an opposite culture, their daughters have a deep confusion about their mothers. They suppose their mothers are different from them. In the novel, the unique American culture does not give the baking to the mothers’ warnings value. The daughters always try to counter to their mothers whenever the mothers express any wishes or want to control them, because they misunderstood the traditional beliefs that their mothers have represented.
In The Joy Luck Club, there is no doubt that Waverly were hindered by her mighty mother Lindo. Waverly felt shameful and yelled loudly when her mother showed off her success to everyone in the street. But the mother was very surprised at Waverly’s anger. Such is the human nature for the traditional Chinese mother who has been educated by Confucianism in China and does everything in the conventional Chinese way. Lindo could not accept the attitudes of her daughter, just as the daughter could not accept the way that her mother behaved in the street. In the Chinese mother’s opinion, a good daughter should be meek and submissive. It is inadvisable for the daughter to argue with her mother on a public occasion. The mother felt sad and depressed, even though Waverly did a lot to rescue the situation.
Now let us move our attention to Waverly’s boyfriend. In most of people’s eyes, Waverly is an intelligent and independent adult, but she is very scared and nervous that her mother disagrees on their love relations, which surprised her friends immensely. From this point of view, as a clever and unique woman, Waverly even “can tell the IRS to piss up a rope, but can’t stand up to her own mother, “and” tell her to stop ruining her life. Tell her to shut up.” (Tan, 1989:173) But she was afraid of her mother.
In America, they show us a totally free mind about their life: people learn to do their personal affairs on their own and become increasingly independent. So her finance and friend can never understand Waverly’s anxiety. In America, they think marriage a very personal thing, so they will not consider lots of mind about their parents. t is regarded as a very right and necessary period. But it has strongly negative state in China, which means loneliness or isolation from the family. Though Waverly was born in the American and learned value in the American way, in her mind, she still care about her mother’s idea.